Finding a friend in yourself when stuck in an emotionless relationship

Book - A friend in Me Emotion less Relationships

I have always found psychology to be an intriguing subject. Recently, I attended a book launch at the National Library Board by Dr. Preeti Pandit, a certified psychologist and counsellor. The book “A Friend In Me  Emotionless Relationship” is a compilation of cases handled by her around the world, across four decades. In it, she relates real life stories of individuals dealing with mental anguishes while in unhappy relationships. 


Almost anyone would be able to find a story in the book that they will be able to relate to – as a parent, wife, husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, son, daughter or may know someone who is going through a situation. Dr Preeti’s intent is to drive home the message that with the right support, any individual going through a difficult period can overcome his or her struggles and go on to live a happy, purposeful life, without any baggage. 


Dr Preeti’s approach is to help her patients overcome their phobias by facing them. She encourages her patients to practise activities that either calm or distract them from their problems, such as meditation, painting or exercise.


In the chapter “Twin Soul” she recounts one of the toughest cases she handled involving a child. I felt surreal reading it, as it felt like watching the “Poltergeist”, the 1982 horror movie, except this was for real. However, Dr Preeti managed to bring the child back to a state of normalcy, without enlisting the services of an exorcist or a medium as depicted in the movie.


With the right support any individual going through a difficult period can overcome his or her struggles and go on to live a happy, purposeful life, without any baggage…”


The book offers marriage counselling advice for those who are in a relationship or who are about to tie the knot. Sometimes when relationships hit a roadblock, you have to be willing to take the bitter pill and go your sperate ways.


The book is an easy read with very little jargon. What is interesting is the way that Dr Preeti is able to handle each case by addressing the unique problems that the parties faced, rather than adopting a cookie cutter approach to solve every problem. A young 15-year-old student from an international school in Singapore, a patient, spoke with such a confidence at the book launch, and was a strong testament to the effectiveness of Dr Preeti’s methods.


Towards the end of the book, under the section “Preeti Pandit Blogs” readers can pick up tips on how to manage anger, fears and depression. With a bit of self-awareness of one’s own emotional intelligence, and the choices that one makes, anyone can learn to handle relationships better, that is Dr Preeti’s message. 


Purchase the book


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